Irving Berlin's - White Christmas (1954)
Starring: Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye, Rosemary Clooney, & Vera Ellen.Running Time: 120 minutes
If you just saw those three lines at the video store or on Netflix you might think, "Wow, a Christmas movie starring that cast? How can I go wrong?" ... and you'd be right! "White Christmas" is a staple of holiday cinema, surrounded by the likes of "It's A Wonderful Life", "Miracle on 34th Street", and "A Christmas Story".
So, you would think that an adaptation of White Christmas for the stage would be just as heartwarming and full of holiday cheer? Well sadly, this performance was more like Christmas in July.
A disclaimer: I am in no way trying to be a Grinch here. I love Christmas. I am the person who listens to Christmas music in mid-November and has been thinking about holiday plans since Halloween. I hold Christmas in regard not as just a secular or religious holiday, but as a time of year when people are and can spread happiness, regardless of the rough situations we all face. White Christmas is one of my favorite movies because of that. It starts in one of the worst places to be on Christmas, the midst of a war zone. Yet, they're trying to keep their spirits up because its Christmas, and despite everything, they're ALIVE. So you know, I wanted this to be great. Did I expect some changes for the stage? Of course, but not to the extent that I saw tonight.
If you have, or are considering purchasing tickets to White Christmas at the Aronoff Theater in Cincinnati, I'd suggest you read this review. Distinct changes were made for the stage version that may disappoint or put-off the purist expecting a near-movie adaptation.
There were two big changes I'm going to highlight (for the sake of efficiency): Cast importance and song choice.
Cast importance:
The top four characters on the bill (Bob, Phil, Betty, and Judy) are on the top for a reason: they are the performers who's storylines need the most detail and time. In addition, they generally perform the most because they're the main characters. This holds true for the movie of White Christmas, but not the stage performance. The focus on the main four characters constantly shifts away to the General, his granddaughter, and his nosy-concierge, Martha.
All three characters now sing. Martha, played by a shrill Lorna Luft has three numbers, including a solo number! These numbers are bearable at best because she sings in her character's voice, which is neither funny nor impressive.
The General is played as a boisterous and slightly overweight blow-hard; instead of a calm, steely, but respectful commander. Also, after the general gets turned down from the army, he writes the president and gets reinstated. This detail only confuses things and adds a ton of dialogue to the final speech he gives to his "men".
Finally, the general's granddaughter is no longer a teenager, but a loud mouth child with her own superfluous plot line about writing a history paper that only exists to fill time. She also annoyingly tries to horn into the show Bob and Phil are putting on. Sadly, the audience endures a performance by this girl, leaving us all to wonder why?
Oh, and I almost forgot, there are more unnecessary characters! There's a "flaming" show director who works for Wallace and is constantly yelling. There's a rotund "country bumpkin" who works as stage hand for the show director and exists to get yelled at. Both are slightly offensive stereotypes, but no one seems to mind. They also have a back-and-forth with the show director and bumpkin whereby the director yells at him; the bumpkin takes a while to respond with a slow drawl, "Yes'm." This is apparently funny, and so it's used multiple times.
Song Choice:
White Christmas is a musical movie. IT ALREADY COMES PACKED WITH SONGS. Now, for those of you who don't know, the song "White Christmas" actually comes from an earlier Irving Berlin movie, "Holiday Inn" It's debut was so popular that it basically moved the studio to make a movie highlighting the song. But, that is not the only song in the movie. No, a great number, "Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep" is also in the movie. This song was immensely popular for the time. Thankfully, both these songs stayed in. However, some songs, like "Choreography" are cut for other Irving Berlin songs. These full songs, such as "Blue Skies", are good numbers but feel completely out of place. These cuts and replacements feel even worse when the classic songs are either cut short, or sung by different cast members. For example, "What Can You Do With A General?" is sung by Bob, Phil, and Martha the concierge. It completely loses its message and falls away unnoticed. Another huge example of poor song choice is the performance of "Falling Out Of Love Can Be Fun." Again, Martha is in this number for some reason, and the use of this song makes Betty's leaving for New York a jaunty scene, instead of something sad and bittersweet.
Once again, I'll state: WHITE CHRISTMAS COMES PACKED WITH SONGS. Frankly, for an adaptation to stage, they shouldn't have had to change anything. But they did, and they changed the most pivotal song of all. White Christmas is supposed to end with its namesake song, as the barn doors open and snow falls. The two couples find each other, and the Inn is a success. Instead, we have the General come out to find the troops, sing a few bars of "Counting Your Blessings" (yes, it's awful), and then Bob asks the audience to sing along to White Christmas. Finally, the curtain pulls back and it looks almost the same. They open the barn doors on the last lines and we see its snowing. They all take their bows and then move into "I've Got My Love To Keep Me Warm." Snow begins to fall from the ceiling (fake snow, but a cool effect.) They sing that song in its entirety, wave goodbye, and the curtain drops.
If this sounds odd, it was. The couple next to me actually said, "What?" The whole execution of the pivotal White Christmas song was poorly timed. I'd like to think this was all a tech thing, but it seemed deliberate. Why end with a different song, and not make snow fall during White Christmas? When I watch the movie, I'm consistently left with the warm feeling of the holidays even though I know what's coming... because its executed perfectly. The song builds, the snowfall is revealed, everyone's happy. This was so disjointed, I left feeling unimpressed.
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I can't help but wonder if all the unnecessary changes, rearranges, and additions were made for the sake of adding time and giving more songs to the actors who don't sing. The stage performance is a half an hour longer than the film and I can only think that in order to find spots for more songs, they had to make up plot changes concerning the general, his granddaughter, and Martha. These changes all affected the four main characters, causing cuts of great songs while adding ones that weren't nearly as well known. To try and make things clear, minor characters end up with more lines and songs, leaving major characters undeveloped.
Now, I realize I sound like I am merely complaining that "things changed" but its something more than that. The distinct holiday feeling you leave with when you see the movie is completely lost in this stage adaptation. If you're a purist like myself, you end up being confused the whole time as to why changes and re-arrangements were made. If you're not a purist, or haven't even seen the movie, you'll likely be equally confused because so much has been changed or removed that the plot doesn't make complete sense. Overall, the singing and dancing of the main characters were good, especially the woman playing Betty (Kerry O'Malley). [It's hard to compete with Rosemary Clooney, but she did.] In fact, the caliber of the main actors makes it a real shame that the adaptation is so poor. They only had to follow the movie near-verbatim and the actors would have carried it beautifully. However, the whole performance seemed to be a victim of unnecessary change.
The point is, you'll likely leave the Aronoff this holiday season disappointed or confused if you go see White Christmas. While talking with my equally confused family, I likened it to going to a fancy, authentic Italian restaurant and then being served Olive Garden. Sure they're similar, but a lot of the details are different... and those details are what make the experience immersive and satisfying.
My suggestion: Save yourself the money and instead gather your family, make hot chocolate and cookies, and watch the DVD of this holiday classic. I guarantee that the experience you get from just being together and seeing this classic in its original form will bring you far more holiday spirit.
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